Why I loathe cats

My friend narrated his experience.

Staring contest with a cat.

The neighbour's cat sat infront of me,
while i was enjoying my Dunhill at my lawn.
It stared at me.
I stare back.
I smoke.
It licks itself.
I smoke.
It licks its privates.
Smoke went into my eyes.
I blinked.
I lost a staring contest to a cat.